Thursday, August 4, 2011

3 ninjas 2011

Meet Samuel, Jeffrey and Michael Douglas! Their grandfather, Mori Tanaka, is highly skilled in the fields of Martial Arts and Ninjitsu. And for years he's been training these boys this technique. He even gave them names: Rocky because he's "solid and cool as granite rock"; Colt, because he's "fast and free, a spirit of a young wild horse"; and Tum Tum because ambition begins and ends with his tummy". But one day, an old "friend" of Grandpa's, Hugo Snyder, is heard from again. He's being hassled by the FBI, and the boys' father happens to be an FBI officer. So Snyder figures if he kidnaps the father's kids, it will ease the tension, none of his own men are suitable for the task, so he hires three dim and incredibly incompetent surfers to do the deed. The boys treat them to a night of Ninja moves and hilarious gags, ala Home Alone. But the boys soon get captured by Snyder, and what is more, they (especially Colt) becomes doubtful of their grandfather, until Grandpa bursts into action and fights Snyder.


Tagline: “Crosses Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Home Alone!”

Really? Because then I would expect Shredder entering the turtles’ sewers and instead of using weapons, the turtles use pizza boxes to construct sophisticated traps, leading to his incarceration. But I guess it would be like Kevin from Home Alone had training in karate.

Summary: We have three kids (Rocky, Colt, and Tum-Tum) who are 1/4 Japanese and learn karate and some weaponry (which they don’t use) from their Japanese grandpa, a former FBI operative. The villain, Snyder, who happens to be the grandpa’s ex-partner, decides to hold them hostage because their father is leading the FBI investigation to crack his illegal operations. Yeah, it would be so cool if my grandpa taught me the art of assassination. It’s more of a martial arts comedy, like a kid version of Jackie Chan films.

Apparently, there’s an international version of the film featuring uncut scenes. Wow, I’d love to see what kind of violence they’d put in a kid’s movie! But for this, I watched the American version.

I remember watching this as a kid and having goals to become a great karate master one day. Tum Tum’s my favorite: always has some sort of comfort food without getting any fatter. The grandpa is the weirdest, yet coolest character. It’s a shame he doesn’t do any of the karate moves during the fight scenes. It’s a painfully obvious stunt double.

Minus all the plot goofs, cheesy kid humor, and overuse of wacky sound effects, it’s still a fun, beat-em-up, childhood movie to watch. But why the hell do the ninjas wear goggles??

3 Ninjas Original Song

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